I write this with equal nervousness & exhilaration. I'm here to talk with you of a new phase of the blog; it is one that I have been contemplating for a few months, & I believe that now is the right time to share it with you all. As you know: my head has been rather rocky, a dangerous place to venture, for quite some time now. I truly do not have the words to voice how much your love & support have meant to me through all of this - but at the same time, I've been feeling stirrings of dissatisfaction with the words that I share with you.
Much of this is due to mental illness, but also: there is life, & the way it continues despite my efforts to slow it down, ask it to stay a little while longer.
Some nights I rush home & pen a quick blog post & barely look it over before publishing. Some nights I do not even publish a post at all, because depression has made me too lethargic. Or, perhaps, a quick round of editing provokes OCD. Some nights I look back at the posts that I've written & feel a twinge of shame - because lately I am not spending the love & time & effort on delivering my words to you as I should be.
This is not fair to you & it is not fair to me.
I have decided that the right path for A Clock That Follows the Shadows of Cats, & for you, lovely readers, is to eschew the race of blogging, & instead make an effort to slow the current.
Though I cannot make a clock tick backwards, I will settle for the next best option: from now forwards, I will be writing blog posts only once per week, rather than three to four times.
Also—rather than sending you a separate newsletter, as I do now, I will instead send you the same posts I write for Shadows of Cats (only, with a few tidbits & sparks of inspiration sprinkled in, as I so adore doing). These musings will be comprised of much the same words & photographs that I post currently—poems & lyric essays & mental health thoughts & Half Mystic/writerly news.
Only, far longer, & more consistent, & better thought out than before. This, at least, is what I am hoping.
A small note I would like to address—this does indeed mean that our regular series on poetry & illness are going on indefinite hiatus. However! Certainly not to worry; I will still be sharing so much poetry & mental health thoughts with you, simply without the labels. (I'm especially excited to be working on some very lovely poetry projects in the time freed up from these changes. You’ll soon see!)
I am hesitant, but still enormously excited for the wonder this will bring to Shadows of Cats. & I am looking forward to appearing in your inboxes more often; I so love emailing back & forth with you, & hearing your thoughts on my words first-hand is the most marvellous thing the universe could ever offer.
Thank you endlessly for having me here, my friends. I am honoured beyond belief that you have chosen to follow me through this journey—& I hope that you too find light in the things that I share with you, now & moving forward.
(p.s. if you understood the reference in the title, you are my new best friend. may i take you out for coffee?)