year of happy

A Love Letter to Myself

Hi lovelies!

Today was one of those days where I started off in a really good mood, but then by lunchtime my brain decided to turn itself inside out and kick out all the happiness. Grrr.

So I was going to write a bit of a melancholy post today, but I pretty much decided screw it, I've had enough sadness for one day. How about we focus on happiness instead?

And even better: instead of just one day of happiness, how about we make it an entire year?

That's right, lovelies - this year I'm going to be participating in an amazing project dreamt up by Allison: the #YearOfHappiness! Basically, the concept is to do twelve amazing and wonderful and, in some cases, slightly insane things (one for each month) and then blog about them and share them with the world.

As you guys know, right now is not such a great time in my life, but I think this will be a fun way to spread the happiness, even if it's just for a little while. So, without further ado, the prompt for January:

Write a love letter to yourself. Write all the reasons you're awesome, write down your hopes and dreams for the year ahead, any resolutions, heck, write what you had for  lunch. Share why you're grateful for 2014 and what you want to achieve in 2015. Share whatever you want - it's your letter.

Hi, you.

First thing: I know you're sad and frustrated with yourself right now. I know you get too stressed out over the tiniest things and that sometimes you cry for no reason. I know there are times when you don't think too highly of yourself and there are times when you wish you could be anybody else. I know how inadequate you feel.

Here is something I also know: you are going to get through this.

It took me a really long time to work up the courage to write this letter, because I am you and we both know that we find it hard to love ourselves sometimes. But in the end I decided to do it, because I think this is something you need to know: it's okay to be sad. It doesn't make you a bad person, or any less than other people. It's okay that said other people don't understand. Sometimes you feel like you're alone, but you are surrounded by so much love and support. Probably more than either of us can comprehend.

There have been so many bad days, and sometimes they all blur together. Honestly, I'm pretty sure there are going to be more. But I've lived with you for a pretty long time now, and here is yet another thing I know: you're stronger than you think you are.

I'm not going to tell you to do anything or give you any advice you won't take, because I know how sick you are of nodding and smiling at that kind of thing. But there are better days coming. Nothing lasts forever, not even the rough patches. Neither of us like the shape you're in right now, but things are going to be so wonderful one day. I promise.

I love you, Topaz (January 2015)

So that's my letter - and I would love to read yours as well. Please do link to yours in the comments section, or if you're not already taking part in the #YearOfHappy, maybe consider signing up! There are still a couple of days to squeeze in January's challenge, or you could always just hop on the bandwagon in February, if that's more your style. ;)

Here's to a happy and fulfilling 2015!

love, Topaz